My time on the couch

I just finished my last counseling session. I didn’t actually lie down on a couch as the stereotype goes but rather sat in a semi-formal and cushioned armchair. I have been going to sessions for a couple months because I wanted to accept myself more and to believe more that I really am a daughter of the living God. I have always struggled with self-worth, and in the past it has hindered me from doing or trying things I know the Lord has wanted me to do. I want to be more obedient and able to serve selflessly at a moments notice, and I don’t want to worry so much what people think of me. This weakness and sin could very easily get in the way of ministry if I let it. Counseling was something I had considered for a while, but sort of thought it was just for crazy people. And maybe it is, and we are all just a little or maybe a lot crazy. Anyway, I was encouraged to think about seeing a counselor during the application process with World Team, and so I did… and God even provided a way to do it almost for free, which is amazing.

The main thing I took out of it wasn’t very magical as much as it was practical. The counselor really helped me to identify a lot of my sin and negative thought patterns and then to understand how I usually respond or cope with them. Then we took all the same sin and thought patterns and found passages in the Bible that laid out the more Godly and biblical way to cope and respond. As I compare life circumstances against scripture more and more, it becomes easier to live more biblically and to have more joy and trust in God. It is one of those answers that seems too simple to be true, but it works. It is all in God’s Word, you just have to know what’s in there and to believe that it’s true.

Here is a brief example. I learned that often when I am down or upset about something, I tend to isolate myself and stew about it. I want to shut out the rest of the world and be miserable. The scripture passage I found is 2 Corinthians 7:10 “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.” When I compared this to my method I was challenged to try something different, to not shut people and God out, but to turn to God first in prayer and bible study, and it has helped a lot.

Or this passage that helped me to re-think what it means to live in freedom and obedience at the same time. “Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. Very truly I tell you, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son [or daughter] belongs to it forever. So if the Son [Jesus] sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

This will all continue to be a process, but as the children Sunday school song goes “Jesus loves me! This I know, for the Bible tells me so. Little ones to Him belong; they are weak but He is strong. Yes, Jesus loves me!”